High Tone Dining

Why eat an expensive dinner in a fancy restaurant when you can do it suspended 150 feet in the air?

Dinner in the Sky will raise you and your party up over any number of exotic locations. Look at these guys eating next to Notre Dame Cathedral.

For a mere $25,000, 21 of your closest friends get strapped into these roller coaster style chairs for a 2 hour meal.

I'm doing this. My choice is to hover over the Tiger pit at the San Diego Zoo. How crazy would that be? Me and my buddies feasting on some prime rib while these hungry tigers stare up at us hoping for a cable to snap.

Just one quick note that I am sure everyone asks; Where do I go to the bathroom? It's simple, they just lower you down and you visit the portable restroom. This system could be problematic as me and my buddies are shot-gunning Old Milwaukee long necks. That crane will be going up and down constantly.

I predict great success for these guys. I do wonder, however, what the crane operator is doing during the dinner. He is probably enjoying his Whopper and fries.

Learn from the Legends

I am not a musician, but this is extremely cool.

I Video Songs will teach you how to play any number of legendary tunes. The best part is that the teacher sometimes in the original musician.

I am seriously thinking about learning to play guitar, because Alex Lifeson of Rush is giving an online lesson on how to play The Spirit of Radio.

Check out John Oates. He will teach you how to play "She's Gone".

Basketball Onesy

One of my colleagues brought me this idea. It seemed blog-worthy.

The Australian women's Olympic basketball team came to play in these super-slick uniforms. I'm still trying to figure out how you get into this thing; Is there a zipper on the back?

I actually like this look. It's a basketball singlet.

The opposing teams were not sure whether to post-up or to attempt a single leg takedown.

My only request is that NONE of the men's teams give this look a try in 2012.

Movie Genius

If you take real animals, add some CGI to make their mouths move, and then get some A-list celebrities to do the voice-over :: what do you get? The answer is mucho dinero.

If television commercials have taught us anything (other than the genius of the song "Viva Viagra"), it is that talking animals are hilarious and memorable. Taco Bell, Budweiser, Geico and many others have tapped into this magic.

This one will be great. Beverly Hills Chihuahua is a lock at the box office. It's a classic "fish out of water" storyline.

I am actually working on a screenplay for this movie where monkeys take over Washington, DC. Everything is going great until Congress goes into session and the monkeys start hurling feces at each other. Anyway, I am still working on it.

Go see the chihuahua movie. My prediction - hilarious

Hot Actress Pitching Micro Brew

Dallas-based Stampede Brewing Company is hitching their covered wagon to Hollywood starlet Jessica Simpson. The blond actress/singer/publicity queen will be the face of their Stampede Light Plus brand. Not only will she appear in some store level ads, but she is taking a 15% stake in the company.

Can you imagine her contributions at the quarterly board meetings? That quarterly meeting, by the way, will be held in my garage.

Who knows? Maybe this brand will really take off. After all, it has a neat position in the way-crowded beer category - "beer for active people"

Personally, I prefer my beer to be targeted towards "lazy, sports-watching, girl-chasing, obnoxious people".

Making Work Fun

How about sticking this cool piece of furniture in your home study? The good people at Office Organix have brought us this useful work station, thus ensuring America can hold it's #1 ranking as the fattest country in the world. Do we really need to work lying down? I was researching the accessory options to see if I could order a bedpan to go with this thing. You think this guy is a little nervous that the 1999 Apple Computer breaks out of that strap and crushes his sternum?

Let's face it, there are only a few things we were meant to do in the horizontal position. And making bids on Ebay is not one of the them.

Hot Singer Pitching Flavored Water

Using my PhD in statistics, I was able to isolate the linear correlation between how hot Carrie Underwood is getting and how ridiculous her endorsement deals are becoming. This billboard is genius. Look at the copy; "Carrie Me Home". She might be talking about the bottle of Vitamin Water, or maybe herself. It just works on so many levels. Now I actually am thirsty. Who said advertising is dead?

Whopper of an Idea

So much for eating at Burger King ever again. It's going to be really difficult to not remember this image every time I roll past a BK location.

For those of you who have not seen this story, our buddy Tim, here, decided to bathe himself in the sink at his place of employment - the neighborhood Burger King in Xenia, Ohio.

In an effort to memorialize his jovial behavior, Tim went ahead and videotaped the moment and posted it online.

Sure, it'd be easy to call this guy an idiot, but he's already found himself featured on all of the major news sites. Therefore, he is more famous and, in turn, more important than me. Even money would say he's hosting a reality show on FOX this fall.

Look, he's a 25-year-old struggling musician fighting the good fight as a fast-food restaurant employee. If taking a bath in the sink at work is his ticket to something bigger, then I say good idea.

By the way, a Burger King spokesperson noted that the sink was thoroughly sanitized and is perfectly safe for restaurant use.

Listen, we've all seen the guy in the sink and I'm telling you that some steel wool and Comet cleaner is not going to cut it. Do me a favor: Pull that sink out and bury it somewhere.

Invisibility Cloak

Do we really need our greatest technological advances to be inspired by Harry Potter books?

OK, I will give you the fact that this is a pretty cool invention, but is it a good idea? It just seems that all of the movies that I have watched about an "invisible man" have ended very poorly for those involved.

What are we looking to do with this "cloak"? Besides Chad, the high school senior, who uses it to get into the girl's locker room, this device has bad news written all over it. You can get away with a whole lot of trouble when no one can see you.

I don't like this one. Let's leave invisibility to the wizards. Plus, this girl in the picture is about to be run over by that guy on the bike.

Broadway Brett?

I have held out as long as possible on this whole debacle. As a graduate of Whitefish Bay High School (Northern Suburb of Milwaukee) and the University of Wisconsin-Whitewater, I am a die hard Packers fan.

I was just out of college when Favre took over the starting position in 1992 (my word, that sounds like an eternity ago). I am officially putting a massive failed bit alert on this move. It's likely he still has it, but not for the New York Jets.

This transaction gets my highest bad idea rating (5-Stars). Brett, please forgive me.

Big Foot Sighting

I've found that thin red line between genius and idiocy.

This incredible yard accessory caught my eye as a flipped through a SkyMall catalog on a flight from Dallas to Los Angeles. When I arrived home, I had a strong urge to retreat to my backyard and find the perfect spot for this masterpiece.

Then I realized that putting this statue near the koi pond would result in a very nasty altercation with my wife.

If you go to eBay you can search this item and actually see insane consumers get in a bidding war over this miniature replica of Big Foot.

Bad idea? I'm struggling with this one, even though they seem to be popular in some parts.

The Mars Rover

I'm a fan of space and stars. I also like rockets and telescopes. But come on. The Mars Rover? How does this idea really pay off?

Don't tell me that it will help uncover the mysteries of the universe and solar system. Find me someone that lies awake at night stewing over that question.

The Mars Rover is scraping a giant brown rock for different kinds of dirt. Oh, pardon me, we found some traces of ice and possible signs of life 29 billion years ago.

What are we going to do once we find something spectacular on Mars? Take a picture? Watch some really smart guys at NASA celebrate with wine coolers?

I would rather them build a rover that I can put in my backyard and tell me if there is any crude oil somewhere down there.

Putting a sophisticated machine the size of a Volkswagen on different planets - an incredible technological feat? Yes.

Laying down $800 million to move some rocks around on a different planet? Bad idea.

Cutting it Straight

If you really need to cut something with this much accuracy, you should probably not be doing it by hand. My 7 year-old son can make the paper snow flakes with the $1.99 scissors we bought at Dollar Tree. If your going to put the effort in to build in the infared guidance system, why don't you just have the freaking laser cut the paper?